Isn’t it annoying when you are looking at hot celebrities behind your girlfriend/wife’s back and you just can’t think of any talent to ogle. I mean let’s be honest it’s tough to think of a hot celebrity sometimes. So we are here to help you, because that’s what we do. But let’s focus on a specific area of the body today…the badonk, the hiney, the booty. Here’s our top four in no particular order. Feel free to add your thoughts.
Jessica Biel – Athletic and fit
Kim Kardashian – A whole yard sale worth of junk in this trunk
Nicole Scherzinger – Could easily bounce some buttons off this dancer’s hindquarters
Jessica Alba – Sculpted by the gods, I dare you to find a flaw
Since I couldn’t figure out how to work the images in tune with the text below is a mish-mash of fantasstic pictures of the above ladies.
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Tagged ass, best, bottom, bum, butt, celeb, celebrity, female, hot, hottest, jessica alba, jessica biel, kim k, kim kardashian, movie star, nicole scherzinger, pictures, sexiest, sexy, star, top
I use this term having stolen it from Daniel Tosh. He also probably would not agree with this blog post at all, but fuck it we move forward for the, no doubt, two fans of this blog.
Now, onto the hotties.
Melissa Hollingsworth – Skeleton
A little Canadian patriotism early here because well we have hot ladies and Melissa is at the top of that list. Pictures don’t even do justice to how smoking hot this woman is as she squeezes herself into a tight lycra suit and flys down an ice tube – down boy. Skeleton athletes need to have strong legs for those quick starts and pushoffs to get them going……Melissa’s just happen to be some of the sexiest out there.
Lindsay Vonn – Downhill Ski
Two sultry ice queens start off the list as they were at the front of my brain as I created this post. But look at this picture and tell me this girl couldn’t be confused with a gorgeous movie actress a la Malin Ackerman or Ellen Pompeo (of Old School fame). Once again a nice tight lycra suit helps to show off Lindsays athletic body and great legs and makes downhill skiing somewhat bearable for the population not from Austria.
Allison Stokke – Pole Vault
That’s right, we’re reaching into the metaphorical, yet true category of sports for this next gorgeous lady. A stand out at Cal University (who knows if she’s good at pole vaulting but she definately stands out in a crowd….ba dump ba dah!) she quickly went viral on the internet before realizing that all the attention was not worth it. So you won’t see any modeling or anything of her online but enjoy the picture of this good looking track athlete. I’m not even going to give the internet people the joy of a well thought out pole joke here, because I respect her too much. Pole Vault teehee.
Isabelle Mercier – Poker
Okay, okay, I know poker isn’t really a sport or an athletic event but I was starting to run out of options. Mercier is a little big more to the yummy mummy side of things but if that lady was staring at you across the poker table we all know you’d go all-in in an effort to impress her, only to have her call your obvious bluff (your tongue hanging out was the giveaway genius) and take all of your chips when you turn over your deuce, eight.
Well that’s all i’ve got, feel free to lip me off and denigrate my manhood but i’m sticking with my choices. If you’re so smart who did I miss? Notice how I didn’t go with the obvious ones that everyone uses (and as Tosh puts it “are 7’s at best”) Jennie Finch, Danica Patrick, Ashley Harkleroad, or Natalie Gulbis.
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Tagged allison stokke, athlete, athletics, beautiful, best, bobsled, body, daniel tosh, female, golf, good looking, gorgeous, hot, hottest, hottie, isabelle mercier, lindsay vonn, luge, melissa hollingsworth, natalie gulbis, poker, pole vault, sexy, skeleton, skiing, sport, tennis, woman, women
Remember when those relatively terrible Tomb Raider Movies came out and they skyrocketed, well maybe air ballooned, to success? What was the reason for the success – the script? the cinematography? Nope. It was all about Angelina Jolie looking sexy and wrapped up in skin-tight clothing that every computer nerd wished their girlfriend would wear….wait a minute that’s not right. Dreamed their imaginary girlfriend, who looks a lot like Angelina Jolie in Tomb Raider, wore everyday.
Then came Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Angelina Jolie dressed like a dominatrix as she wrestles Brad Pitt (dude’s a good looking man) away from the unquestionable beauty of Jennifer Aniston. She topped the sexy lists and played a key roll in men’s, and no doubt women’s, one-hand stands with themselves. She was saucy, an apparent sex fiend, and downright gorgeous. The perfect storm of sexiness every guy dreams about and every guy-who-dreams-about-her’s girlfriend scoffs haughtily at.
Skip forward a couple of years and sure, she has gone a little crazy with snatching kids up from every possible country on the planet, but she’s still Angelina Jolie – Sex Goddess. The things dreams are made up of. But then you started to see more images like this…
Those veins are crazy and they are an instant dick-limpener. So you think, okay she’s just getting older, these things happen. A quick googling shows she is just 35 this year!!!!! When you are getting out-aged by Julia Roberts, Sharon Stone, and even Helen Miren then it is time to turn in your status as “Hot” i’m afraid.
So who does that leave as the automatic topper of most sexy lists? Hmm sounds like a post that could be fun to write. As a self-accredited journblogalist I will definately have to do some serious research to make sure I do this story justice. I won’t take the easy route and just give it to Megan Fox or Bar Rafaeli without offering up other possible sex symbols. This will be my War and Peace.
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Tagged aging, angelina jolie, beautiful, brad pitt, celebrity, dream, girl, gorgeous, hot, hottest, jennifer aniston, lady, lara croft, list, mr and mrs smith, sex appeal, sexiness, sexy, tomb raider, veins, woman